Baggage … we all have a little we carry around with us. We have past experiences that can create a little baggage, it helps mold us and define us – sometimes, for the worst and sometimes, for the better. But I watch the world go on around me, and I sometimes wonder why both women and men put themselves through the ringer with a prospect that has a consistent history of being unreliable, unfaithful, and a leech. Yeah, maybe said prospect is freakin’ smokin’ and hilarious, but underneath those layers, the prospect reeks of douchery. If there’s a trend of wreckage left behind them from their past relationships, run for the mother lovin’ hills, people. It’s not worth it.
Maybe I’m a little old school because I believe in love that is good and pure. Love that builds you up and allows you the freedom to chase your dreams. Love that doesn’t merely use you for a roof over their head. If you can be married and in love with someone one minute, then two weeks later ‘love’ someone else, then we do not have the same definition of love. Life is too short to get wrapped up in words that don’t have the same meaning for you and your love interest. Sometimes, I think we get it in our head that we can just magically fix people. Make them better. Make them whole. The reality is the other party needs to be willing to be helped and really look at themselves to evaluate that maybe the problem wasn’t just everyone else, but they were part of the problem. If they don’t see an issue with rolling over people and leaving a wake behind them, then is that something you really want to take on?
Marriage takes a ton of love, trust and work. You have to be willing to compromise. Sometimes, it’s not about being right or coming out the winner. It’s realizing that you’re in this thing together and you have to be willing to bend. Every relationship is different. What works for some may not work for others. One thing I was never willing to do was start a relationship with someone who was still married. Personally, I feel like love is created and founded on trust. If you have someone who hopped from their wife’s house straight to your house, I wouldn’t be the type of person to believe the BS they’re poppin’ off with. They would speak, and I would smell shit.
So, if you’re just getting out of a crappy relationship, and the douche / douchette has somehow managed to move on at warp speed, let them. The douche / douchette can keep their baggage and drag it off to someone else. Preferably, to someone at the same level of douchery. That would only seem fitting.